Reading wrap

I finished the book "Lamb," by Christopher Moore. It's about the unaccounted years in the life of Jesus told through the eyes of his best friend, Biff.

I laughed a lot in the book. Just the other night I thought I'd wake the house when I was reading the discussion between Jesus and Biff on the Sermon on the Mount. They were running through who should be blessed and what they should inherit.

Also funny: The apostles. There was Thomas and his invisible friend, Thomas Two. At times, the apostles are portrayed as, well, idiots and dense people, though Judas and Simon are menacing and maniacal.

Overall, it was a good read. The end rushed through the crucifixion and the resurrection. I thought Moore copped out here. Also, the fate of Biff and Judas was hurried. It's like he didn't want to write this section. The book would have been better if he ended before the death.

Moore also abandoned the first-person chapter openings by modern day Biff and stuck with the narration, which was a bit disappointing.

Anyway, it was an amusing read. The author takes shots at all religions, so it's an equal-opportunity offender.

I'm sticking with the ancients theme and started Anthony Everitt's "Augustus." I enjoyed his earlier work, "Cicero."

Thought: No snow day today!

More snow

Here are a few more pictures of the recent snow days. Both were taken early in the morning.

The girls are playing their video games. They didn't want to be disturbed.

In the other, our dog Milo, the 100-pound chocolate Lab, is leaning on the fence and barking at the passing sidewalk plow. The picture is from our kitchen window before I had a chance to use the roof rake on the 14 inches of lake effect that fell throughout the evening.

Our other dog, Mischa, just stayed in the house as long as possible because the snow was over his head. He came in with "snowbellies," meaning his entire underside was coated with snow because it's so deep. Snowbelly is a term, by the way, from the Nick Jr. cartoon "Backyardigans," one of my favorite shows.

Jayne and I spent a chunk of Thursday morning clearing the driveway. We worked with our neighbor, Kathy, to clear it all off. (We have adjoining driveways) Then we all headed to work.

Jayne, though, slid off the road on 58th Street south of 136th Avenue and had to be towed out of the snow. She was not injured, thank goodness, and I think I was more shaken up than she was as we were talking on our cells about it.

I gave her the number of the wrecker service. Yes, I have it in my wallet because I use them so often. Stop laughing!

I passed three slide-offs on my way in. All were SUVs. Ha!

Thought: And the Kia drives on.

Winter wondering-land

A few pictures to start your day.

One is a glance out my front window -- standard January fare.

The other is one of our dog, Mischa -- standard January dress. It's been cold -- temps in around 4 degrees -- so Mischa, who hates when it's below 50 degrees, gets some sweater help to keep warm. Our other dog, Milo, is a 100-pound chocolate Lab who loves this weather. He can't get enough of it. He'll stretch out in the snow and get covered in lake effect and, while looking at Mischa shivering in the snow, say "neener, neener."

I had some folks ask a question or two about my last blog entry. I'll do my best to answer:

Yes, I still have a job,

No, I don't know what it is.

Yes, I'm extremely stressed and vulnerable.

No, I wasn't trying to be clever with the "imagine" approach. I want to keep my job -- whatever it is -- so I can't share much without fear of being let go.

Yes, I think I'm getting sick because of all this. And,

No, I don't think Lindsay Lohan will benefit from a "scared straight" approach.

I'm working on coping with the insanity about me. I have seen again that Marx was right about labor being a commodity not an investment, and the Gita is true that doing your best at work despite the circumstances is truly the mark of an enlightended mind.

Thought: No enlightenment here. Just lots of tissues and cough drops.

Imagine

Imagine, if you will, a Dilbert cartoon.

Imagine, if you will, you're in that cartoon. Imagine you get called into a meeting with all your co-workers and told you no longer have jobs.

Imagine, please stay with me, that you don't have those jobs anymore but you must continue to work at them. Continue imagining that you are told to reapply for a new set of jobs with new titles and responsibilities, but don't know what job you will get, what the schedule will be, what the pay will be.

Imagine what that does to your insides.

Imagine some of your co-workers, some who have been at the company for two decades, were, a few days later, told that there are no new positions awaiting them.

Imagine the tears.

Imagine the fears.

Imagine, if you will, it's all a Dilbert cartoon. I imagine you'd be wrong.

Thought: Imagine all you want. It won't change anything.

The junk we give

Jayne did some cleaning of the closet over the holidays and collected a couple of bags of clothes to donate. We often take clothes and other items to Christian Neighbors, Goodwill, Community Action House and the Center for Women in Transition.

This time, I took the clothes to the Center for Women in Transition, a place that helps women and families displaced by domestic violence. I also took a few cell phones we no longer use. We've brought old cells there before. The center can program them to call 911 and gives them to women in bad situations so they can get help ASAP.

Anyway, I went to the Center for Women in Transition Wednesday to drop off these items. I handed the woman at the counter the box with the cell phones and chargers in it. Here's a recap of the conversation and please note the words "thank you" never come from people in the organization:

-- There are three cell phones in here, say I.

-- Do they work? says she.

-- Yes. We upgraded and ...

-- You know, we don't take junk.

-- (Dumbfounded) They work fine. I don't give away junk. (awkward silence) I have several bags of clothes to donate. Where should I leave them?

-- Are they women's clothes?

-- Yes, ma'am. My wife cleaned out her closet over the holidays and ...

-- Are they all seasonal clothes?

-- Huh?

-- Are they all winter clothes? We don't want any summer clothes now.

-- Uh, I don't know, ma'am. My wife loaded the bags and ...

-- We don't have room for junk, you know. We have very limited space.

-- Uh, ma'am, we don't donate junk. (I thought I already made that clear)

-- Are the clothes on hangers? says another woman with a clipboard who was standing behind me.

-- What? No, ma'am, they're in bags.

-- Well (says annoyed clipboard woman), our volunteers don't have time to sort through your stuff. If it's on hangers we can speed up the process. Our volunteers are very busy, you know. When you come back, please put as many as possible on hangers.

-- Yes, well, thank you. Goodbye.

I always like to feel welcome. Again, note the words "thank you" never left their lips.

I told Jayne about this and she was a bit put out. Seems most of the clothes were, indeed, "seasonal." Lots of turtle necks, sweaters, warm pants -- things a woman just kicked out of her home might need in January and February in Michigan.

I'll take the material to the Community Action House today. They'll say either "thank you" or "gracias," depending on who's staffing the donation center today, and I'll say, "you're welcome" or "da nada."

Thought: Da nada? Does that mean "You umbrella"?

Ringo

I got back to working out today at the Fennville Community Athletic Center. I hadn't been on the bike since November because of the holiday hours at work, the bad weather (swinging a shovel is the best exercise anywhere) and the kids being home from school.

I rode a bit today and got on the eliptical machine. Wow! I used that machine back when we were members at the Holland Community Aquatic Center (I do miss those days!) and then it really built up my leg muscles. As soon as I hit the road on a real bike that spring, I noticed the difference. I hope to repeat that come March.

So, I work on my stamina on the bike at the gym and build up the legs on the elipitcal. All for $20 a year.

While pedaling, I was listening to a CD Jayne got me for Christmas -- Ringo Starr's new greatest hits collection.

Stop laughing! He has greatest hits despite what one of my co-workers said last week. She couldn't name a single Ringo single. Kids these days.

I have a couple of Ringo albums (vinyl) and, yes, he's not that good. In fact, I think he's one of the luckiest men in the world. He got into the most creative musical group of the 20th century and he isn't that good. And, you know what: He knows it.

That's why I like Ringo. I enjoy "Photograph," which I think is one of the best songs out there, and "It Don't Come Easy" is telling, but I like his attitude best.

He seems to be the kind of guy you want as a friend. John Lennon could be biting and mean (genius often is); George Harrison could be preachy (the spiritually aware can be boring); and Paul McCartney's ego takes up its own ZIP code (but he is great). Ringo, though, is just easy-going and wants to be buddies with everyone.

And that's cool.

Thought: Take a dose of rock 'n' roll and wash it down with cool, clear soul.

Clean start

The photos above seem to say it all. Jayne made the girls clean their room over the weekend.

Alyssa is smiling and proud of her work. Mischa, our little dog, is tired from helping out so he thought he'd take a snooze.

Elspeth is not happy about having to pick up her toys and make her bed.

We had a nice set of holidays here. No one had to go to the hospital and nobody in the family passed away. A good start to the new year.

The 14-plus inches of snow that fell throughout the last few weeks has melted away with heavy rain and 57 degree afternoon highs. Wow! Just a few days ago I used my new roof rake for the first time to cut down on the ice buildup on the eves. Strange weather.

Reading this and that

I finished a short biography of Charles Dickens by Jane Smiley -- she quoted Peter Akroyd extensively, and I read his biography of Dickens a few years back. Dickens is an amazingly complex man and, I agree with Smiley, the first celebrity as we in the 20th and 21st centuries understand the term.

Keeping in the spirit, I re-read "A Christmas Carol" to remind myself how good he really is.

Now I'm reading a book my boss lent me called "Lamb." It's a book about the lost years of the life of Jesus as told by his resurrected best friend Bif. I'm a few chapters into it and have laughed out loud more times than I can count.

I loved the opening section where Bif talks about his name (a nickname he got from the sound of his mom smacking him) and his friend's name: Jesus being the Greek of Joshua; Christ not being his last name; and, what made me laugh hysterically, that Bif had no idea what the "H" is Jesus H. Christ stood for.

Thought: School's back in session today. Hooray!