Make 'em laugh

So I was thinking about a stupid joke the other day and started laughing. Really laughing. And I realized that the people at work thought I had finally snapped. Maybe I had because it was a stupid joke. Juvenile. But it is the funniest joke ever. Ever.

Soon I'll share with you what I think are the five funniest jokes ever. Ever. But my laughing fit got me thinking about humor.

I love to laugh. I would rather watch a comedy than a drama almost any day. However much I love "Casablanca," "Reds" and "Citizen Cane," and consider them masterpieces, I would rather watch "Caddyshack," "A Fish Called Wanda" or "Strange Brew."

That scene in "Caddyshack" when Billy Murray's character talks about caddying for the Dalai Lama, with the pitchfork against the kid's neck, that's classic: "So I got that going for me." I'm laughing now.

Oh, and that whole Chuck Norris Web site (www.chucknorrisfacts.com) sends me into howls though I've never seen an entire Chuck Norris film. I'm proud of that.

Other things to laugh about

For me, humor is a release. It is funny, but the laughter can manifest other emotions.

When I'm super-stressed, my laughter can become uncontrollable and even sinister. People have often misunderstood this for "strangeness," as my one boss puts it, but it's a healthy release of tension. The pressure of deadline work on a newspaper, coupled with all the problems in personal life, can make me reach the breaking point. Often, instead of blowing up with anger, I find humor and just let the laughing loose.

Also, I can laugh when I'm sad. I do cry about things. I cry a lot. I'm a prissy, girlly man about tears. I've told people that I cry when Spock dies in "Start Trek II" and when Jessie sings in "Toy Story II." Victorian poems make me cry, as do simple reflections on historical events (almost any Holocaust image will send the tears flowing, or, just the other day, I was reading a recount of the battle of Cannae that brought a tear).

But I'll also laugh in awkward situations, such as the death of a family member or a bad event, such as a car crash or fire. I try to do this only around people who understand that I'm not laughing about the tragedy, but am so disturbed and upset that tears can no longer handle the overflow of emotions. The more I joke about a topic in this situation, the more upset I am and the harder time I have reconciling the beauty of life with the ugly reality of truth.

Someday I suppose I should study humor. I tried in college, but I was not allowed because the course on humor was only available to "gifted and talented" students. I was considered neither gifted nor talented. That explains so much of my life (and why I hate "gifted and talented" programs at any school) and why my donations to my college can be called laughable.

Top five jokes

You have suffered through my psycho-babble, so here's the point of my blog today. The top five jokes that make me laugh any time, any place. Please remember that the jokes are often best "heard," not read, because of spelling and double meanings, and that if you insert them into everyday conversation, they're even funnier:

5: From a police report. Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was a salted -- Nut.

4: ... I didn't even know the pope was wearing a hat!

3: Two guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

2: Rectum? Darn near killed 'em!

1: Did you hear about the optometrist? He fell into his lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself.

Thought: I'm laughing. Inside.